Push Button Paradise

This month's episode of XML Annoyances is out, go forth and read, my child, for a mildly contrarian view on things. :) Hence the subtitle, Tipping Sacred Cows.

Now, I grew up in the rural midwest, so I have a thing or two to say about cow tipping. The wikipedia article is fairly negative on the subject, stating in part

The four corners of a large "American-style" domestic refrigerator fairly closely approximate the spread of a cow's legs. If the refrigerator were cut down to 1.5 m (5 feet), filled with 400 kg (880 lb) of weights, and placed in a muddy field, tipping it would offer a comparable challenge to tipping a cow.

Another source estimates that it would take five grown men to generate enough force to tip an average cow.

The way I see it, the main problem with these kinds of studies is that they assume the cow is a static thing, like a refigerator up on blocks. As if cows are so used to lateral pushing that they'd just stand there. No, I'm fairly certain the cow would react. Depending on the reaction, conditions could either favor or work against the cow actually tipping over. Given the bovine intelligence level, I wouldn't rule out the former.

Personal experience? One time when I was a younger lad our family was out visitng some friends on a farm, about an hour out from our tiny city. "Hey, lets go tip some cows!" "Uh, OK." So we crept out through the muddy grass, coming up to a pasture fence. An unsuspecting cow grazed a stone's throw away. Literally. I watched horrified as my guest started picking up rocks and sidearming them at the unmoving target. None of the shots connected, and no, no alcohol was involved (but thanks for asking!)

So in conclusion, I find it interesting that a perponderance of the naysayers have "disproved" the concept using just pencil and paper, not having gone anywhere near an actual breathing animal. On the other hand, those who claim it to be possible normally say so based on, ahem, field testing. As usual, my position is somewhere in the middle. -m

posted at: 09:49 | under: 2005-11 | 1 comment(s)